Two Feelers, Six legs & WICKED!

"Two Feelers, Six legs & WICKED!"
A true story by Stefan K.

I just had war with this cockroach in the kitchen. Fucking bugger!

"Did you kill it?"

TOTALLY. i think it died... it should have!

Cause I had marcoroni just now and I just left the bowl in the sink after that.
I went down to the kitchen for some grapes and I saw that fucker in the bowl.

So I took like this brush/scrub thing for dishes, and started to distract it, to get it out of the bowl and it ran away hid behind some dishes but stupidly ran towards me.
It then stopped at the end of the kitchen tabletop with its stupid back against me. I took a quick shot with the brush on my hand.

"WHAM!" Erupted with that smack against the table edge. The cockroach then fell to the ground and one of its feelers broke.

It was upside down and its trying its fucking best to turn around but to no avail.

I then took the floor cloth that was lying beside the bugger, covered it and took a kitchen slipper to smack it further, brutal and relentless!

I lifted up the cloth up and it was flat to the ground with its organs bursting out with juice.
but I swear, its first 2 legs and 1 feelers were still moving!

I tried to clean up the mess, so I took like 'ginormous' kitchen papers to cover it, wanting to sweep it all up and toss it into the bin, beside it. But, little did i know... The cockroach some how managed to move its pathetic ass to the side of the tissue that was covering it and hanging its first 2 legs on the side on the tissues.

I was pretty convinced it was gonna die eventually, so I just left it there and let my maid do the cleaning up, because I did not dare to touch it.

Satisfied, I took my grapes and a packet of Iced Milo and went up to my computer and started telling Elaine this story amidst watching Australia's Next Top Model...

-THE END-

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHA! This is freaking hilarious! :P

Credits: Elaine, for coming up with the title!

P.S. Everyone's entitled to their own OPINIONS!